Why I Live In The Philippines?

A friend named "Maeng Ni" posted this. Lahat ng sinabi niya nakakatuwa at totoo... When I travel, people often ask me why I live in the Philippines ? Well here it is...

It is the only place on earth where...

• Every street has a basketball court.
• Even doctors, lawyers and engineers are unemployed.
• Doctors study to become nurses for employment abroad.
• Students pay more money than they will earn afterwards.
• School is considered the second home and the mall considered the third.
• Call-center employees earn more money than teachers and nurses.
• Everyone has his personal ghost story and superstition.
• Mountains like Makiling and Banahaw are considered holy places.
• Everything can be forged.
• All kinds of animals are edible.
• Starbucks coffee is more expensive than gas.
• Driving 4 kms can take as much as four hours.
• Flyovers bring you from the freeway to the side streets.
• Crossing the street involves running for your dear life.
• The personal computer is mainly used for games and Friendster.
• Where colonial mentality is dishonestly denied!
• Where 4 a.m. is not even considered bedtime yet.
• People can pay to defy the law.
• Everything and everyone is spoofed.
• Where even the poverty-stricken get to wear Ralph Lauren and Tommy Hilfiger (peke)!
• The honking of car horns is a way of life.
• Being called a bum is never offensive.
• Floodwaters take up more than 90 percent of the streets during the rainy season.
• Where everyone has a relative abroad who keeps them alive.
• Where wearing your national colors make you baduy.
• Where even the poverty-stricken have the latest cell phones. (GSM-galing sa (magnanakaw) .
• Where insurance does not work.
• Where water can only be classified as tap and dirty.
• Clean water is for sale (35 pesos per gallon).
• Where the government makes the people pray for miracles. (Amen to that!)
• Where University of the Philippines where all the weird people go.
• Ateneo is where all the nerds go.
• La Salle is where all the Chinese go.
• College of Saint Benilde is where all the stupid Chinese go and;
• University of Asia and the Pacific is where all the irrelevantly rich people go.
• Fast food is a diet meal.
• Traffic signs are merely suggestions, not regulations.
• Where being mugged is normal and It happens to everyone.
• Rodents are normal house pets.
• The definition of traffic is the 'non-movement' of vehicles.
• Where the fighter planes of the 1940s are used for military engagements and;
• The new fighter planes are displayed in museums.
• Where cigarettes and alcohol are a necessity, and where the lottery is a commodity.
• Where soap operas tell the realities of life and where the news provides the drama.
• Where actors make the rules and where politicians provide the entertainment.
• People can get away with stealing trillions of pesos but not a thousand.
• Where being an hour late is still considered punctual. (Grabe talaga 'to!)
• Where the squatters have more to complain (even if they do not pay their tax) - than those employed and have their tax automatically deducted from their salaries.
• And where everyone wants to leave the country!